a wild friday night

at our house! these days we usually spend our friday nights in. but with these two little cuties, we still have our fun. we even get to have a date night every now and then, sometimes that involves leaving the house, other times...we have date night in. and sometimes that is even better. we are starting the weekend in the right direction 3 hour afternoon naps for the boys (at the same time) be.still.my. heart. and caleb's been going down so much better at night now that he is napping early. tonight's cries at the door lasted minutes before he plopped on his bed. and-he even woke up happy from his nap today. be.still.my.heart. again.

so here's our lil family dinner. i was sitting at the table just cracking up watching the boys interact. lucas was coo-ing and flirting and caleb was just chitter chattering. dave and i were just exchanging amused smiles across the table...and i don't know what came over me..maybe the way lucas turned his head just so to watch his big brother, or the way caleb was making funny voices, or the way lucas looked at me and started laughing and the way he chomped on his spoon and made happy noises, or the way dave and i just smiled and stared at each other and lingered, not wanting the moment to pass. no one got up to start the dishes or carry the boys off to bath time. we just sat for awhile longer and enjoyed... just feeling happy. it was just one of many sweet moments with my family, but it is one i'll always remember. i grabbed the camera of course, but it just doesn't quite capture the sweetness of it all. however i'm still glad just to have their voices and happy smiles to look back and remember.

tonight was also the very first time lucas said 'da da' cheers and clapping to be heard by all. such a sweet voice. he coos ba ba and has been blowing bubbles, but hearing da'da for the very first time was pretty exciting! now i'll have to capture it on camera :)...he has also just started signing more and or clapping...we're not exactly sure which cause he kinda does it all at the same time when he is eating.... :) but we're loving it all the same!

is this why?

is this why some people have more than one child?

giving tickles

 i always knew, that if God willed it and blessed us, I would have more than one...or two...( but two is great for now!) i read this article the other day. click here. i completely agree. life has been easier with two. so much easier than i ever imagined! there's more to do...but really what makes it easier is perhaps just the two of them together and the way they are with each other. caleb has been and continues to be so gentle and loving with lucas. i am amazed often times at his pure sweetness with lucas. and lucas..well he lights up whenever caleb is around. he watches with his eyes big and blue, taking in everything big brother does. i pray the bond they share now continues and grows always. i hope they have the kind of relationship i have with my sisters. best friends. i think it's rare to be as close as we are and i sometimes feel like i'm witnessing such a special sweetness between these two. sometimes my heart just spills right on over and i think, 'how can i love them any more?' how can it get any better than this? oh every now and then caleb gets overly excited and knocks lucas right to the floor telling him it is tummy time, or he grabs his nose and hits his eyes in his ubber toddler excitement to play a game. but really? he's such a gentle giant that i don't think he would know what it is to be mean if he tried? i pray we can nurture them to grow together...

deepening the bond that they already share.

but i also pray

 that each one also is recognized for their own strengths and differences... lucas' calm and easy going nature..his peaceful presence in our lives...

and caleb's sensitive and cautious nature that empathizes and cares so deeply for the ones he loves.

this weekend is mother's day and it feels extra special to have this be my first mother's day as a mama of two.  i feel so blessed to have these two sweet boys in my life and i feel ever so grateful everyday to their daddy who has kept me strong and taught me so much along this motherhood journey. he has been and always will be my rock. i will be thinking about my mom and dave's mom. the two women that shaped our lives and helped mold us to parents we are today. dave and i both look up to them and if we can do even half the job they did raising us with such loving hands, well...i'll be more than happy. to our grandmas and aunts, and to all the special mothers i know, friends who are mothers too. i'll be thinking especially about those mamas having their very first mother's day. still in early bloom. motherhood is such a special privilege. i  feel so honored to be a mama to my boys. So honored that God chose me to be theirs. i hope they always know and feel my love. i'll always love you my sweet boys! thank you for making me a mama.

and one more article reflecting thoughts on motherhood. click here here if you'd like. i love  this  blog. she always leaves me with good thoughts and reflections on life and motherhood especially. she has always given me just the right words i have needed to hear at just the right time. i wish i could write half as good as her! and many others, but besides that :) i just love finding a good read!

Happy Friday :) Wishing all the mamas out there a very special mother's day this weekend. Especially the ones we hold very near and dear to our hearts. You know who you are :)

oh and i almost forgot, i'll leave ya with a video from lunch today. we've been doing some signing with lucas and caleb is really into it. the way he says 'more lucas?' gets me everytime. maybe cause he sounds like he's from another country with an accent? who knows. it is just too cute for words in my opinion. but that's just me thinking 'mostly' everything he does is cute.

so enjoy if you'd like :)

life made up in moments.

these-are of course some of my favorite ones. warm breezy days watching the boys play, family time, reading books, silly laughter, toddler's chitter-chatter and baby's coos and smiles.

this is not a good pic...but i just needed a lil naked chub shot and this is all i got before big brother woke up.

 kissing chubby cheeks. holding my sweetness warm and close. my precious little one...always so content with life. who came into the world filled with a spirit of peace.  

 watching my little boy grow and learn, his constant chitter chatter. happy sounds he makes.

then- there are other, not so fine moments. tantrums, tears, battles i'm not up for fighting. frustration and losing my cool. moments that seem to last too long. struggles that i feel don't end. and little things that add up big. feeling like i might be doing just about everything wrong. there are a lot of moments where i am the one needing a 'calming down' in the other room. moments when i think to myself... 'he's two.two.' so little in such a big world. remember that kimmy. just remember, he's trying too. trying to communicate to these big people, who just don't get it. but the whining, and the screaming, and the no's to everything little....sometimes-they make it hard to remember this-and then my voice gets louder than i wanted and it takes a minute or two...but then all i can do is give a big hug and explain mommy's feeling frustrated too. yes. lots of frustrating moments between the toddler and his mama. sometimes i wonder? is it because he's so much like me that i'm at a loss? and that's why daddy always seems calmer...and unrattled? is it because lucas seems so much like his daddy? calm and content..that i can breathe in his sweet peace and life gets easier? it's always been easier with him? why? is it because i'm more sure this time around? i feel bad sometimes...but i push the thoughts aside. after all, we're learning. everything new to caleb is new to us too. I was a firstborn, Dave was a firstborn. We came out all right i think. Caleb will come out all right too. The thoughts still come though, try as I might to push them far away. Why does everything have to be so hard? It's the age right? but it's been hard all along. The temperament? My sweet and gentle Caleb, so sensitive. There are so many hard moments at this age. But so many sweet ones too. I just have to keep reminding myself. I hurt my foot so hard on the ground that I let out an 'ouch' and caleb came running over and kissed it better. I'll remember that. I was on the floor trying to do a palates video and Caleb ducked under me and kissed me sweet. I'll remember that. The hard moments only make the easy ones all the better. I can only appreciate them all the more. Watching lucas sleep sweet dreams in my arms fills me up. Sweaty curled hair fresh from sleep. Fingers closed tight round' mine. My lil nursling's curled toes and hands that touch my skin and smiles that form on baby lips from good milk and tickles from mama. Ohh how these moments make up my world with goodness. I'll take the hard ones. They mold and stretch me so...into a better mama to these two little loves of mine. and a better wife..to the one who holds me strong through it all..

Greatest Gift

Dear Mom-

This is what I remember...

Bedtime stories read, every night. Tucked in safe, words sung sweet.

Church, lined up in a row. Your lap filled, hands held warm.

Teenage tears, you never let go. you never let go.

swim meets, head under water, hands touch wall, your voice cheering..the loudest and proudest.

camping trips, you holding daddy's hand

italian songs and homemade italian sauce, served with love

you, at the sink, hiding tears, a 3 hour drive to my new world, college. my brave mama, letting go.

your words, simple words that kept me calm all through labor as i braved the new and unknown. motherhood wasn't so scary with my mama there. i felt safe. after all- hadn't you taught me so much without having to say anything at all?

lots and lots of tears and you at the other end of the phone line...always listening...always there.

you have always been there. and that is the greatest gift you could have given me. your time. i wanted to be a mother because of you. because you have always made me feel so incredibly loved.

patience. love. encouragement. grace. determination. loyalty. friendship. hope. courage. peace.

you gifted me by showing me through your love.

and you continue to give me the greatest gift, by being my mother...

i love you mom. thank you, for always being here for me and for always believing in me...even when i had a hard time believing in myself.

i love you always.

you've blessed me in more ways than i can even count...and because of your blessings, you're blessing someone else, a a mother in Haiti will be honored through a Maternity/Child Survival program for an entire year. I've linked up with Ann for the 1000 moms project and I'm sharing your gifts. Your blessings. I love you mom!

Link up here and honor your mama today :)

what i'm loving

spending everyday with these two. we have our 'not so good moments too' but- big picture, waking up and spending my day with them- well...it really doesn't get much better than that.
kissing sweet chunky cheeks, listening to toddler tales and jibber jaber, hearing sweet laughter among brothers, tickles, kisses for boo boos, and hugs for tears. tending to little ones, (God's sweet gifts). If only I could bottle up lucas' coos and jibber jabber while he eats. If only I could hear forever Caleb's sweet words and the things he comes up with on a daily basis that crack us up. If only I could kiss the chub and smell sweet baby scents forever....if only. I try and remember these things on the days where the mundane like another load of laundry, cleaning up crumbs for the umpteen time, washing sticky hands and wiping dirty faces gets the best of me...these everyday little things make up my life right now. But they fill it up big. And i'm ever so grateful to dave for being able to support us so that i can stay home and wash sticky fingers and wipe away sad tears. I am forever grateful for these days with my boys. They are so precious to me.

moving on.

i'm loving my Pioneer Woman cookbook that I found at the library yesterday. OHhhhhh so worth the toddler tantrum! We made these this morning.

Photo Credit belongs to Pioneer Woman  and  recipe can be found here

 I told dave they would knock his socks off...and if he happened to be having a not so great day...it'd get 100 % better after popping one of these sweeties in his mouth...I even made him bring one for a friend. And because I can attest to being a disaster in the kitchen, I'll have it be known that they came out delish! and tasted every bit as wonderful as they looked...there were no kitchen disasters for me this morning I am happy to say ;)

Not only does the Pioneer Woman have a cookbook, she's got a blog ya'll! right here . And saturday morning...she's on the cooking channel..I'll definitely have to watch her in action! I've just added her to my 'I'd die' if I got to meet in person list!' After eating one...(okay 2!) of these mouth watering creations, I've decided my run tonight better be extra fast and extra long to have even the smallest possibility of burning some of the calories I just consumed (lots of butter and sugar in this dish) but oh so worth it!

So that's what I'm loving right now. My boys and baking :) Life's simple pleasures! What are you loving right now?

sugar and spice

and everything nice? this morning playtime was going wonderfully...so wonderfully that when that moment came where I had to um....use the ladies...I thought, I don't want to ruin a good thing...so I'm going to sneak and sprint. (anyone tried this before?) i do it a lot. I sneak...sprint...and pray that in the 2 minutes and counting that I am away nothing will happen. no damage to little brother or anything else for that matter. Most of the time, everything is fine. And then-other times, I'll come back to find Caleb's knocked Lucas to the floor for 'tummy time' or an open poo diaper on the carpet (um...that was this afternoon. thank.you.) toddler took his diaper changing duties in his own hands. This is why I seriously check in every few seconds if Caleb is alone (and too quiet) and why the boys are not alone for more than a couple (bathroom and or laundry change over) emergency seconds at a time! But-my bathroom sprint was fine....and I came back to find sweetness in the doorway..so i grabbed the camera fast and clicked away.

'here you go lucas'

little brother wants in

working it

our walk to the store to pick up envelopes and stamps...special mothers days surprises to be spread with love accordingly

lucas' meal time delight

and...my personal favorite from today. True Toddler Tantrum. in all its glory. Toddle hood with a Capitol T my friends. T for tantrum. Flat faced in the middle of the walk way, coming home from the library this afternoon....it started in the library (which was interesting with lucas pressed up tight in the ergo) since it was hard to quietly leave with my pinching stone silent toddler who would.not.budge. an inch. for mama. and then carrying 40 lb toddler plus 22lb baby (ergo style) out the door. 'big puff of breath' hello motherhood. it got better though. the sprawl occurred outside thankfully. we got to the car hand pulling all the way (with big tears) someone might have thought I was taking him away from his (real life mother?) but no..besides the crazy Thomas shorts (which auntie jen thought could have caused the tantrum since wearing those out in public would put anyone to shame) he was matching little bro with matching blue shirts (so real mama was hand holding the right toddler) we made it to the car....kicking and screaming (mama trying not to laugh in the face of toddler's tears) the whole way. (i mean, life really is tough at this age..so i sympathize, but the entire situation was kind of ridiculous! we were a sight to say the least) anyway, as I drove home, I quietly hoped i had picked some good books for all that hard work i had endured! hello. the car door opened at home and all was well in the land of toddlerhood again. thank you cause dinner preparations had to be made and mama wanted some quiet time. (thanks to the front porch watering hose, i got some)

all that is to say, that while I scanned for books, I found this one. Which was talked about with my bff laura who now that I (sat and read the entire book cover to cover tonight, seriously, cover to cover) I completely understand why she would hold it near and dear to her heart. cause, i think i just found a new love. Rachel Ray and Giada, don't worry girls. I still love you so. But hello pioneer woman...welcome to my kitchen.

I'm not gonna lie, I don't like reading recipes, I don't like reading cookbooks either. (actually most of the time I don't even like being in the kitchen)  So it is really saying something that I read the entire thing tonight! (i'm turning over a new leaf though, cause don't tell dave, he might get too excited, but ever since rachel ray came into my life and kitchen, I've enjoyed wearing the domestic cooking apron more than I ever thought I would!)  One more thing. She's funny. Like-really, really, laugh.out.loud. funny. A girl after my own heart  I really want to post some of her funny lines, but I'm going to refrain myself, you'll just have to pick it up and see for yourself.

can't. wait. to try out some of these goodies tomorow with the toddler.

between the thomas fashion wear and the sniffles, oh and waking up from nap time and all- it really was a tough afternoon.

one more thing. (and i'm sorry, i couldn't help it) this picture is for the books. (that we'll bring out with his first girlfriend...and for sure his future wife...and then his children i'm sure will want to see it too...)

for what it is worth...the early nap thing, working wonders. 2 hour naps-but bedtime and wake time = 7:20-7:20 (the 6:15am door knob handle wiggle lasted a second before sleepy boy went back to bed for another hour) I love naps. and I love bedtime too. Especially when i get to partake.

Nighty Night.  

mondays mean

my very enthusiastic helper (let's hope he takes after dad in the baking department) cause mom isn't that good!

my lil chunk of love. i love this outfit on him ( a hand-me-down) but i just love what it says. I like frogs, dirt, and mud) such a little boy outfit. and it just brings out all his lil rolls.

starting off the day in my new running shoes! going for a run. (thanks to my sister and mom who are the ones who have inspired me to wake up with the birds, they've been going to a 5:45 am biking class. crazy girls!)

my loves

easy peasy rachel ray dinner!

mondays mean....cleaning, laundry, fresh sheets (my favorite) vacuuming, dusting, baking, and starting it all off with a run! (in my new running shoes) can you tell i'm excited? the picture doesn't do them justice. they have a streak of orange on them which you can't see and they are soooo comfy! I got them at the Adidas outlet (i'm stuck on Adidas for always i think) and with them i got 3 dollar shorts! What a deal (the shoes were 30, which i won't spend more than 40 on running shoes)
anyhoodles! caleb and i tried to make dave some fudge brownies but the wax paper started burning in the oven (apparently wax paper isn't the same as parchment paper? this i didn't know....) and so needless to say it is now sitting in the fridge till hubby can help....i was so excited to make a special chocolate treat for dave too (he likes to get a daily fix). it seems most of the time my 'baking' goes wrong....but I'll keep trying!
naps weren't exactly aligned today for the boys. this has happened only a handful of times since i try hard to keep them on the same routine/schedule for my sanity. But Caleb's been waking up way too early (6/6:30) and not falling asleep about 7:30 or 8...i think the problem is that his naps are starting too late (like 1/1:30 and he's been sleeping for a couple hours or more since he's waking up so early....) so i put caleb down at noon today and he took a great nap and was down before 7:30! finally!!! lucas slept great today too and even though naps were not synced it was nice to have quality one-on-one time with each (although i much prefer them both up at the same time! they keep each other entertained and it makes my life a whole lot easier)
dinner tonight was a new rachel ray and it was easy peasy. the only thing i wasn't prepared for was the spicy kick. caleb kept going on and on about how it was 'a lil spicy' and puckering up. lucas is finally eating like a champ, we've had a major breakthrough. not only is he opening up his mouth for us now, but he's finger fooding it up (tofu, blueberries, banana, avocado, pears, carrots, cheerios, and lentils) he loves it. he gobbles it down with gusto. i love this little guy. he's such a sweetie, just doing things on his own timeline. he gets so happy when he eats and just coos and smiles away. while lucas seems to be on the mend from his cold, caleb is still under the weather. we started up his singular tonight for his cough and i'm hoping that helps and he's back to his good ol' self shortly. besides runny noses it was a productive day. i always feel like i accomplish a ton on monday and then can relax and enjoy the rest of the week with the boys (minus the daily cleaning that comes with two little boys who have messes that follow 24/7!) but my favorite thing about monday is ending a good long day with one of my favorite shows Make It Or Break It on ABC. It is a show about gymnastics and the characters are trying to make it to the London Olympics. I used to do gymnastics when I was younger (was never that good) but I loved it all the same so I enjoy watching it! If the weather keeps the heat up we may be spending much time outside in the water or inside with the air conditioner (depending on allergies)

Happy Monday ;)

and because i love me some blog reading... two of my favorite (always leave me inspired) blogs.

http://www.71toes.com/2012/05/home.html  on home.
http://www.aholyexperience.com/2012/05/what-every-mother-has-to-know-before-mothers-day/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+HolyExperience+%28Holy+Experience%29 for mothers. thank.you.

they put into words what the heart feels.

off to have a taste of the fudge brownies that hubby fixed.

okay, i've been asked for recipes! you can find them here and here