some things I didn't know....motherhood.

can't get enough.bare toes. green grass. sunshine. happy lil digger.

life before babies....things i didn't know...

i never knew~
how completely perfect a newborn would feel in my arms
how simply sweet newborn skin feels, smells, and looks.
the heartache of watching your three year old struggle over bedtime, getting dressed, gross motor skills, talking in a group....or the joy felt as you watch your three year old starting to slowly overcome bedtime struggles, getting dressed, gross motor skills, or talking in a group. How much your heart swells with pride and love because things come harder for him than most, but you just know he is so brave. You've taught me so much little man.
how peaceful sitting in a swing could be with a baby in your arms. That peace can come wrapped up in a little package of perfection...Lucas you are my sweet, peaceful boy.
that laundry would never be done all at once...again....and expect everything to get dirty not mere moments after coming out of the dryer.
how patience can stretch out far beyond what you thought you were EVER capable of.  It is possible to remain calm and serene while helping your three year old through a melt down and talking your one year old down from free flowing drippy tears, even if you have to excuse yourself for a sanity break a few minutes later.
just how much a 'sleepless' night affects your day, your mood, your sanity.
how much you could love someone soo small in an instant.
bad moods never stay, and good moods can make you forget about all the bad moods that have happened that week.
how kisses and hugs will make your day that much better.
that being home with my babies makes me the happiest mama but is the hardest job i've ever done; i wouldn't change it for the world. I wouldn't change them for the world.

Their struggles, their joys, their sadness, their smiles....they are wrapped up so beautifully in the essence of MOTHERHOOD
before becoming a mama I was carefree, I ached to hold my own child but didn't know the weight that would carry once holding my own two babies. before becoming a mama I could stay up late and sleep in. I didn't have to worry about someone else and whether they were eating or sleeping enough. But I also didn't know that peace that comes with babies tucked in their beds with eye lashes fluttering and deep breaths floating. I didn't realize how much more fun beach days could be when you have a toddler who loves building sand castles with daddy and and a baby that loves the water. I didn't know the joy that came in having my own little family; two sweet boys and their daddy who make my world.

Becoming a mother is like jumping into a pool of water, it surprises you in the most unexpected ways. But once you dive in, you don't ever want to come out. I love my baby boys and I am so blessed that they were chosen to be ours. Through the ups and the downs I couldn't have a better hubby at my side.

to the moon and back.