some updates. my mind feels like the ocean, washing up and bringing back. back and forth filled up with so many thoughts for my sweet firstborn. i alternate between relief...sadness...hope...fear...more relief...gratitude...
i didn't sleep much last night. the early morning hours were spent awake and held by my one calming force keeping me pressed warm to his strength and praying quiet prayers with tears and hope and questions and trust in Him. He is already there I keep reminding myself...if He brings us to it, He'll get us through it.
we had caleb's OT consult last night. we heard words and things we expected and some we did not, but overall it was eye opening and we left with a wealth of knowledge and tools to help our sweet baby boy.
Caleb will be starting Occupational Therapy (tuesday was his first day). He'll be going 2x a week and we'll be doing a Home program as well to integrate what he does in OT into our home.
There is a lot to understand but basically Caleb's Central Nervous System (where information is processed) and where sensory information goes is having a hold up in what it is processing; causing him to inconsistently to be able to attend, focus, interact, and be purposeful. OT will help get to the root of the problem by identifying the exact problem for the challenges Caleb faces in gross and fine motor skills and his social anxiety. Doing specific activities with his therapist he'll be releasing chemicals to the brain that will rewire his pathways and build appropriate responses so that he can engage fully in his environment all of the time. He will be able to better self-regulate among other things. It has only been two days but I already feel so much hope and can already see a difference in his moods.
To give you an idea... at therapy the session started with a massage, swinging on a hot dog shaped swing (where he hit bowling pins with tennis balls) and then he did a bear crawl ( this released dopamine, to help with anxiety) he did jumps on a trampoline, and push offs from the wall, and at the end completed some puzzles and matching (and by that time his body was 'woken up' through sensory input) and he was able to stay focused on the puzzle and matching task for longer.
At home we are following a home program for him that incorporates a 'sensory meal' and two 'sensory snacks' which basically consists of 'sensory awakening' activities. This will help with his melt downs, his social anxiety, even his drool and eye troubles. It is amazing how all this is exactly what he has struggled with and by doing OT therapy it will tap into all his struggles and he will be able to better cope and adapt to his environment. I know I explained a watered-down version of what we heard and my basic understanding (my scientist hubby understood more) but basically we are getting the help for Caleb that he needs and tools for us to help him. It is such a relief to know that it wasn't all just in my head! I'm so glad I trusted my intuition and followed through. I'm so grateful for our supportive family. I'm so blessed by the friend that helped bring us to the place we are taking him. I know God has his hand in all of this and so while it is overwhelming and scary and we don't know what we are even doing most of the time...He does. And He has lead us to some incredible people who have helped hold our hands along the way. I know without our parents it would be much harder, but they are so encouraging and supportive. And Caleb has an amazing therapist. So the finances and the gas and travel time twice a week and naps and all that...it is working itself out. I'm putting complete trust in my heavenly Father because...He's got this.
My heart hurts with the love I feel for these precious boys of mine. They fill us up with so much goodness.
"enabling children to sprout their wings and fly!" is what covers our binder of info from last night...it is their motto at the place caleb goes. I know that we are on the path for our precious firstborn. He is sprouting his wings and we'll be watching him fly.
*i forgot to mention his thyroid! a long and thorough apt on friday and the good news is that while he is in the abnormal range it isn't too much that he needs to be on medicine for it. We are doing blood work to make sure all the other hormones from the pituitary gland are in good working order but for now we'll keep following up every few months with blood work to make sure his thyroid levels remain okay.
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